Eat Sleep Work Study

Six steps to being awesome like me

You may not know this, but I am a grocery shopping genius. (A grocery shopping genius that happens to be suffering from an angry kidney stone right now. This stupid thing won’t go away.)

Anyway let me break this down for you. This Sunday I went grocery shopping at Publix. I spent $91.95 and I saved $27.26. That’s about 22%.

And I am going to share my secrets with you. Ok, well, they aren’t that secret, but I am laying them out there for all you who are also suffering during this “economic downturn.”

When I am on my game, here’s what I do:

1. Check the local grocery prices at SmartSource. Click on the tab that says “Local grocery deals.” It will ask you for your zip code and then give you all the current sales at all the local stores. I normally narrow it down to Publix only cause I don’t like shopping around. Publix also puts their sales insert on their website. If I remember, I’ll check the website because the sales inserts sometimes have coupons in them. If I see a coupon I want, I grab an insert at the front of the store when I come in.

2. Go to the Farmer’s Market. It is always good to look at the sales before you do this, so you definetly know if you are getting a good deal. I try to buy as close to my grocery list as possible, but I tend to just buy whatever looks good and adjust the rest of my menu around the fresh produce.

3.Cut coupons. I am not so good at this, but I still do it. I only cut coupons for the stuff I actually use. Even if I don’t need it or want it right at the moment. The key is how you use them.

4. Combine coupons with sales. Publix was having a sale – buy two boxes of Honey Nut Cheerios, get one free. I had a coupon for $1 off three boxes of General Mills cereal. And the Publix insert had a coupon for a free gallon of milk if you bought three boxes of General Mills cereal. Here’s how it broke down:

Box of cheerios: 4.99

Box of cheerios: 4.99

Box of cheerios: 4.99

Total: 14.97

Get one free deal: – 4.99

$1 off coupon: – 1.00

Total: 8.98

Plus – a gallon of milk for free (worth $2.89)

So I paid $8.98 for $17.86 worth of food.

I try really hard to keep track of sales and always combine sales and coupons.

5. Buy meat in bulk. When payday comes around I go to BJ’s. And I buy chicken breasts, pork chops, whatever, and then repackage them in reasonable portions. That way I always have meat to build meals around.

6. Buy generic. Publix’s store brand items are pretty damn good. The only thing I haven’t liked is their cottage cheese. Even their soda is good.

Now, just so you know, I am not crazy about this. I am too lazy to be crazy about coupons and shit. But, the bit of effort it takes  is worth it.

Brief

Today I cancelled my Sirius satellite radio service, my Cooks Illustrated membership, my Ancestory.com membership and my Consumer Reports membership.

Dick got word that he is probably going to 32 hours a week soon. And my paycut started this paycheck.

I am trying to figure out what else I can cut.

In other news – my kidney stone has broken up a bit.

That’s all the good news I have.

Catharsis

Dear Complainer: I am very sorry that you are “so upset” that your/your daughter’s/your son’s wedding announcement can’t run run on your requested day. I am sure that as you signed all of those checks to pay for the wedding, which probably cost more than I make in a year, you lost your ability to read and follow directions. The form you signed says you have to turn your stuff in 16 days in advance. Now, if I turned in my rent check 10 days late, do you think my landlord would be all like, “Hey, that’s cool, I know you’ve got life or death situations like planning an extravagant wedding to attend to. You can’t be bothered with rent!” Ok. Sorry, I mixed two metaphors there. The point? You are not special just because you or someone you love is getting married. It might be your special day, but it is just Saturday to about 99% of the rest of us. Rules still apply to you. Thank you.

Dear Activist Event Organizer Guy: I am sure your event is really cool. But, if you can’t figure out how to a) compose a proper e-mail and/or press release (especially one without glaring spelling errors) or b) use our very easy online calendar, you do not need to be organizing press for fun events. You should be the guy that hands out balloons at the event. Or gives out name tags. Thank you.

Dear Complainer: I am not kidding about the deadlines. I really don’t care about your special day. Thank you.

Dear Coworkers: When you sing at your desks, I want to shoot myself. Now, occasionally, one of you will bust out with a tune I like, and  therefor I can recognize it through your botched rendition. That’s fun. But half of the time your song is completely unrecognizable. Please, I can handle talking to yourself. I do that shit all the time. And I can handle the occasional whistle. But please, unless you have background music, and a choreographed number to accompany your song, I don’t want to hear it. But, if you have that other stuff, bring it, cause I like to be entertained. Thank you.

Dear Old Guy at the Cafeteria: I know you really want to help, but you can’t hear anyone when they give their orders, and you take 5 minutes to just write down the order, and then… and then! You can’t remember the price. There has got to be some other way you can serve in the organization. Please consider being the salad bar guy. Thank you.

Dear Third Party Tech-Services Guy: OMG. I have no idea what that e-mail meant. Seriously. I had a 16 word question, and you gave me four paragraphs of answer. Now, it may be the percocet talking, but I couldn’t understand a damn word of the thing. It was like reading vulcan. Or something. Please, use short phrases and recognizable words. Thank you.

Dear Kidney Stone: You are the one who made me this cranky. I think we could be better friends if you were outside of my body instead of inside of it. If you could consider evacuating in 24 hours, I would totally keep you, instead of giving you to the evil doctors to examine and destroy. And then I could have you dipped in gold and made into a pendant, that I would wear on a necklace next to the percocet that I dipped in gold and made into a pendant. A reminder of two things that go great together. Please consider. Thank you.

Now with 7.5% more fun!

I am not going to lie. Work sucked this week. We got paycuts. I walked out of not one, not two, but three meetings, mainly because of complete and utter frustration. I had lots of extra demands on my time and didn’t get all of my work done before I left today. Last week wasn’t much better – a co-worker was diagnosed with lung cancer.

In the face of all of this corporate bullshit, I’ve had to find some little things in my workday that make me happy.

My co-worker’s diagnosis of cancer corresponded with her 45th work anniversary. When she returned to work after being in the hospital for the week, we celebrated her anniversary with a surprise cake. The entire newsroom staff gathered around to congratulate her and shared their favorite stories (mostly all hilarous and baudy) about her tenure. It was nice to have a chance to celebrate, in spite of everything.

My friend and cubical neighbor Dee and I started a new blog, and I think it is going to be really successful. It’s been nice to have more creative control over a project.

It’s March Madness time and we’ve got a “survey” going on. Watching basketball at work is so much more fun than talking about paycuts. I really, really suck at college basketball bracketing though. Seriously. I am glad it only cost $5.

We are getting new food service in our cafeteria on Monday. And they gave us $5 coupons. That may make up for the $5 I am going to lose in the March Madness “survey.”

I got a thank you note from a reader.

The weather’s been really nice this week. (Not work-related, but good anyway.)

You know how people can get really, really punchy when they are tired? And things are suddenly much funnier? Or crazier? I actually laughed more this week than I have in a long time. What else can you do? We laughed at some hilarious (and true) rants about our “management.” And we all laughed at various dirty jokes. And we laughed at a friend who admitted he hadn’t told his wife about the paycuts – he was going to wait until their new computer arrived. He didn’t want her to cancel the order. But the story was in the newspaper, we said, don’t you think she’ll read it? Nah, she doesn’t read the paper. Only we would find that funny.

Would you like fries with that? Or a newspaper?

In 2002 I hated my job. I worked for a mega-one-of-the-largest-corporations-in-America-has-received-alot-of-press-lately-yes-it-was-a-bank company. The hours were awful (4 ten-hour days: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday and Saturday) and you had to clock out to go to the bathroom. I hated the job so much that it made me sick. Literally. I was constantly sick and at one point had bronchitis for two months. The money was ok. The benefits were awesome. But the corporate mentality was too much for me, and when I left that job, I specifically looked for a non-profit.

Now, 7 years and a non-profit later, I’ve found a job I really like. So, its a newspaper, not a non-profit (technically) and I totally bought into the whole “Fourth Estate” idea. And yesterday we got word that most of us would be receiving a 7.5% pay cut. After the pay cut goes into effect, I will be making less than I did in 2002. So, in seven years I’ve developed marketable skills, worked my way up through various jobs, managed more projects, become a better employee and I’ve actually received no financial benefit for doing so. Sweet.

While most members of the newsroom were angry, I was just sad. I felt so niave.

And then, guess what? Today, I came in and found out that the company that owns my paper had just announced that they would be investing 8 milli0n dollars in a new cable company they just bought.

Now I am just pissed. And considering a career in the growing field of healthcare. Or welding.

A Good Thing

Last week we were watching a PBS special on wolves and coyotes that live in Yellowstone National Park. While they howled and did the things that wolves and coyotes do, Louie took notice. He was fascinated with the sound and walked right over to the TV and stared at them for a while. I don’t know how good his vision is, but he stared a while, then sat back down and stared and then got back up and stared. It was really quit amusing. Then, he decided that the dogs must actually be behind the TV, and he kept investigating around the TV. In the eight years we’ve had him, I’d never seen him respond to something on TV. Maybe it’s H’s sweet HD TV we’ve got now.

We also found a jump drive that had some old pictures on it, including some cute shots of Louie. This one is great:

H’s suggestion for a caption: I’m a hot dog. Get it? Get it?

Louie looks so young and puppy-ish in that picture. He’s got a bit of gray beard now.

This one of Maggie is awesome too:

She is a crazy outside cat now and doesn’t do cute stuff like climb into file drawers. Mainly she comes into the house when it is cold and then hacks up hair balls in weird places and runs back outside as soon as she possibly can.

So, why I am talking about my pets after a month of silence? Cause there isn’t much else to talk about that isn’t depressing. H is out of a job. My job is cutting hours. A big part of my job has become covering other people’s mistakes or responsibilities because they aren’t. The industry is depressing. I can’t afford school right now. I seem to have lost all of my creative impulses. And on and on and on.

So, I am focusing on my cute pets and my cute husband. Other good things? I purchased the first three seasons of “Homicide: Life on the Street,” one of my favorite TV series of all time. I’ve been watching a couple episodes a night. I have great friends, even though we can’t afford to go out to dinner and drinks as much anymore. We got a Wii. Even though H doesn’t have a job right now, she’s become the housewife I’ve always wanted. She did a bunch of my laundry and gave Louie a bath this week. So, I am trying to remember the good things. Like this:

This is Louie checking out some birds on our last trip to the Keys. We can’t tell if he really likes birds or really hates them.

Hungry Hungry Hippo

I am going to ignore yet another long blog hiatus, and instead share some tasty recipes. We had an awesome Super Bowl Party last weekend and shared some delicious food. I thought I’d put some of the recipes all in one place, for prosperities sake.

EMB’s Award-Winning Old-fashioned biscuits (makes about a dozen)

2 cups self-rising flour
1/3 cup butter-flavored shortening
2/3 cup milk

Mix together flour and shortening, using a fork or a pastry cutter. Add milk and mix with a fork until all ingredients are just moistened.

Roll out dough on a floured surface, and cut into rounds using a biscuit cutter or a glass. Place on a baking sheet with edges touching, and bake at 425 until lightly browned on top, about 8-10 minutes.

Suggestions: It is really, REALLY important to handle the dough as little as possible. If it’s handled too much, the biscuits will be smooth and tough on top. I like to pat the dough out with my hands, rather than using a rolling pin, but as long as you don’t roll it out too flat, a rolling pin works just as well.

*****

EMB’s Chicken Chilli

Chicken Chili (makes 4 servings)

1T canola oil
1 pound boneless, skinless chicken breast, cubed
1 cup chicken broth
1.5T cornstarch
1 can (about 15 oz.) Great Northern beans, drained
1 can (14.5 oz.) fire-roasted tomatoes
1 cup frozen corn kernels
1.5T onion powder
0.5 tsp cayenne
0.5 tsp chili powder (I used about 1.5 tsp, but I like chili very spicy)
0.5 tsp garlic powder
0.25 tsp cumin
0.25 tsp oregano

In a large skillet, cook the chicken in oil over medium heat until no longer pink, about 5-10 minutes.

Stir in broth and cornstarch. When the cornstarch is dissolved, add beans, tomatoes, corn and seasonings. Bring to a boil; cover. Reduce hear and simmer 10-20 minutes, until soup reaches the desired consistency, stirring occasionally.

Serve with tortilla chips, sour cream, shredded cheddar cheese and green onions.

Suggestions: I cooked the chicken in a Dutch oven and just added all the ingredients to that to avoid transferring between dishes. I think to make the chili in a skillet, you’d need a pretty darn big skillet, so I’d cook the chicken then transfer to a medium or large saucepan to complete the recipe. I also neglected to drain the tomatoes, and it kept the chili very liquid-y, which I didn’t much care for, so if you want a thicker consistency, make sure to drain the beans AND the tomatoes. I don’t think it’s especially spicy, but I really like spicy food and am not terribly sensitive to it. However, if you’re not wild about a lot of spice, just tone down the seasonings a little bit and taste as you go.

Notes: She added some black beans as well.

******

David Garrard’s Buffalo Chicken Dip

Ingredients
1 8-ounce package cream cheese
2 cups cooked chicken (a store-bought rotisserie chicken works best), shredded
1/2 cup buffalo wing sauce, recommended brand Texas Pete
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1/2 cup blue cheese dressing (eyeball it)
1/4 to 1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese (eyeball it)

Prep:
Preheat oven to 300°F.
Cover the bottom of an 8×8″ dish or pie plate with cream cheese.
In a large mixing bowl, combine the shredded chicken, wing sauce and butter, and pour over the cream cheese-filled dish or pie plate.
Top with just enough blue cheese dressing and mozzarella cheese to cover (adding too much cheese will cause a thick skin to form that will make eating the dip difficult once the cheese cools).
Heat the dip in the oven for 20 minutes. Serve with Scoops (Tortillas or Fritos) alongside for dipping.

(This dip went fast. Like 10 minutes. Delicious. I love David Garrard.)

*****

Chicken Sate with Spicy Peanut Dipping Sauce (From America’s Test Kitchen Family Cookbook)

6 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, trimmed
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1/4 cup packed dark brown sugar
1/4 cup minced fresh cilantro
3 tbs. ketchup
2 garlic cloves, minced
1 tsp. tabasco sauce
4 scallions, sliced thin

1. Freeze the trimmed chicken for about 30 minutes, then slice it super thin.
2. Combine all the remaining ingrediants and pour over the chicken strips. Marinate for at least 30 minutes, but not more than an hour.
3. Put the chicken strips on skewers. I recommend you soak the skewers in water for about 40 minutes beforehand. If you can’t, make sure to cover up the exposed skewer wood with foil so it doesn’t catch on fire.
4. Adjust an oven rack about 6 inches from the broiler element and heat the broiler on high. Put the skewers on the broiler pan and put in the oven.
5. The recipe says that you should broil 8 minutes, until fully cooked, flipping halfway through. I did 6 minutes on one side and 4 or so on the other side. Just keep an eye on them, because broiling can go awry very quickly.

Spicy Peanut Sauce

1/2 cup peanut butter, creamy or chunky
1/4 cup hot water
3 tbs. fresh lime juice
2 tbs. ketchup
1 tbs. soy sauce
1 tbs. dark brown sugar
1 tbs. minced fresh cilantro
2 scallions, sliced thin
1 1/2 tsp. Tabasco
1 garlic clove, minced

Whisk the peanut butter and hot water together until smooth. Add in the remaining ingredients. Serve. Do not leave out the lime juice!

Note: As with all things I make – I think I probably doubled the garlic and halved the cilantro.

*****

I am starving now. Must go find food.

Photo Goodness

So, a few of my favorite friends have received cameras for Christmas, and I wanted to share a few of my favorite photo links:

Photojojo. Subscribe to this newsletter. They have great ideas, an active forum and lots of good stuff.

Digital Photography School. Very active forum, weekly contests. Some very bad and/or cheesy photography on there, but a good place to learn.

The Image is Found. Wedding photographers in San Diego. Doesn’t sound that exciting, right? Well, they are awesome. They have a great info page, with lists of all the equipment they use. Their blog includes lots of non-wedding photos. They also teach photo workshops, and I swear to God, if I had a bunch of money sitting around, I would totally go to one.

365 Photo Project. There is some info on Photojojo and on flickr – take and post a picture every day. I am seriously considering doing this in 2009.

Picasa. Some people love flickr, but I like Picasa, because I worship at the church of Google. There is also zooomr, which allows users to have more control over their photos. I’ve had some user issues though. So proceed with caution.

Jpg Magazine. Good stuff. You can submit info for their monthly publication. Its pretty awesome.

Film is Not Dead. This guy is awesome. He still uses film. And he does workshops – which I would love to attend. Another inspiring site.

Photoshop Express. Its a fun, kind of online, user-friendly version of photoshop that allows you to do some creative stuff. Don’t go too far though. There is a fine line between cool and fucking ugly.

If anyone wants to do the 365 Project, let me know!

Anniversary

On Dec. 7, 1999, Dick broke my heart. We’d been very good friends for a while and had found ourselves, on many occasions, well… making out. On the couch, in the bed, on the floor. Whatever. Anyway, I finally told him we needed to figure out what we were doing, and he declared that he wasn’t ready to be a “boyfriend” and he just wanted to be friends.

So. I went home to my apartment and cried. And then I called my mom and cried. And then my mom chose that moment to tell me that she was engaged. And I cried some more. And then I pulled myself together and said I would give him a month, and if he hadn’t changed his mind by then, I was moving on.

It took a week. On Dec. 14, 1999, Dick told me that he had thought about it and he wanted to be my boyfriend. We celebrated by making out on the couch in his living room, in the house where we still live today.

In the past nine years… We’ve both gotten fatter. I’ve had many a medical mishap. We quit smoking. He started smoking again. We’ve realized we are both slobs. We got a cat, then a dog, and then somehow adopted two other cats. We’ve moved my sister approx. 18.5 million times. He made my try frog legs, eel and falafel, all without incident. (For some reason I was most afraid of the falafel.) We’ve fought. A lot. I threw a bowl of sherbet at him, he punched a hole in the wall. (Separate incidents.) We’ve rearranged our living room furniture a billion times, and at one point, threw all the furniture away and started over again. (You can do that when everything you own was purchased at a garage sale or a thrift store.) Until last year, we’d only spent 3 nights apart during our entire relationship.

In nine years, there have been some terrible moments. Moments of doubt, personal and shared. Complete and utter anger. We’ve had the mundane and the extreme. Throughout it all, I’ve never lost faith in our ability to make things work. I still get butterflies in my stomach when I think of our first kiss. And I still get giddy when he says my name (oh my god! he knows my name!).

So, Dick, thanks for driving me crazy, in a million wonderful and challenging ways. I hope we make it 90 more years.